Oh remember, remember

I remember waking up to your loud voice yelling at us.

being so afraid to come home from school.

Watching you, watching you hit my brother.

Now you just deny all of it.

Its ridiculous that you don't remember it

You will never know what damage you have done.

I remember sitting in your room listening

Listening to you tell us you didn't love our mom anymore

Hearing that was heart wrenching 

Trying to forgive you for everything is the hardest thing

It's hard to love a man that has caused you so much pain

I remember when you made her cry.

How mad I was at you

Wondering how you could do that to a woman you loved.

And you left her for that bitch of a woman.

Keep telling your lies.

No one knows the truth except for us.

Go to hell

I miss my dad.

My real dad.

Not this man.

This is a different person.

 

Duck or Duct

Is it duck or duct when you are talking about the certain kind of tape?  I sincerely don't know?  

Everyone says that duct tape can fix anything.... Can it fix a marriage?  Can it fix anything other than thing that don't have meaning?  People say that the most important things in our lives are built with a steady foundation...that cannot be made with damn duct tape.  You need something more stable than that annoying crap.  Bricks build a stable foundation metaphorically and literally.  You can't have some stupid flimsy sticky crap to build a life on.  You never hear anyone say that they built their life from duct tape...NO  they say something to the extent of they built them with hard work and bricks!   

YOLO

Probably one of the stupidest things I have ever heard.  YOLO?  Carpe diem is so much better

Falling into the pit of despair called death

Why does death have to be such a "bad" topic to talk about.  When I die I want to die doing something awesome!  Just think if we were resurrected after death?  Which makes me think of a how I met your mother episode:
Barney: Jesus waited THREE days to come back to life. It was perfect! If he had only waited ONE day, a lot of people wouldn't have even heard he died. They'd be all, "Hey Jesus, what up?" and Jesus would probably be like, "What up? I DIED yesterday!" and they'd be all, "Uhh, you look pretty alive to me, dude..." and then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected, and how it was a miracle, and the dude'd be like "Uhh okay, whatever you say, bro..." And he's not gonna come back on a SATURDAY. Everybody's busy, doing chores, workin' the loom, trimmin' the beard, NO. He waited the perfect number of days, THREE. Plus it's SUNDAY, so everyone's in church already, and they're all in there like "Oh no, Jesus is DEAD", and then BAM! He bursts in the back door, runnin' up the aisle, everyone's totally psyched, and FYI, that's when he invented the high five. That's why we wait three days to call a woman, because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait.... True story

That was possibly one of the greatest episodes known to man by the way.  

But anyways, back to the death topic.  I, like most people want to live life out to its fullest.  Not just being a dull person who hates their job and just hates life.  

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” 
― Mae West

To all you kids who say YOLO.  Im pretty sure she said it first so HA.

Don't live life regretting what has happened in the past.  Our past is what defines our future.  So just embrace the present while you can and hold on cause the future will be here soon.

We're Over!

The idea of a breakup letter was probably one of the greatest things ever, so here it goes.

Dear "Blah" (name shall be kept confidential)

You are probably one of the most needy people here on this earth.  And honestly you don't need to know every freaking detail of my life.  Just to say that you are one of the most ridiculous people on this planet would be an understatement.  I wouldn't be surprised if you never have a boy/girlfriend ever again in your entire life.  NO ONE can deal with the baggage that comes along with you.  You are so full of yourself its ridiculous, no one should be that self centered.  GET OVER YOURSELF.  You talk to much.  You think you know my life story.  You talk to other people like you know every freaking detail of my life.  Maybe if you actually talked to me you would know some real things that are going on in my life.  Good luck with you future love life, I'm glad I'll never be a part of it ever again.  

Good day sir/miss.  I said good day!

Insert name here

Thinking about you like.....

My own rendition of the original, not as good I know but its a work in progress

I'm thinking about you like shoes think about laces.

Like computers think about keys

Like fingers think about typing 

Like typing thinks about Microsoft word

I'm thinking about you like pants think about pockets

Like pockets think about holding things

I'm thinking about you like legs think about feet 

Like feet think about toes 

Like toes think about nails

Like nails think about being clipped 

Like......hair thinks about being clipped

I'm thinking about you like, like crazy

I feel like a MONSTER

One of my most bands is Skillet, these are the lyrics to one of their greatest songs called Monster.  if find myself thinking that i have become the said "Monster"  

Enjoy

The secret side of me, I never let you see

I keep it caged but I can't control it

So stay away from me, the beast is ugly

I feel the rage and I just can't hold it

It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls

It comes awake and I can't control it

Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head

Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

My secret side I keep hid under lock and key

I keep it caged but I can't control it

'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down

Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun

( From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/s/skillet-lyrics/monster-lyrics.html )

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

It's hiding in the dark, it's teeth are razor sharp

There's no escape for me, it wants my soul, it wants my heart

No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream

Maybe it's inside of me, stop this monster

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I've gotta lose control, he something radical

I must confess that I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster

Cool Pictures

  This is me, on a horse

I like to joust

These are my friends

Fears

Fears, do you actually want to know what I'm afraid of?  Are there actually fears that people have in the world?  Or is it people just using that as an excuse not to do something?  It boggles my mind to think that i could be getting out of some crazy things by just saying that it was one of my worst fears.  People who say that they are claustrophobic are probably just using that as an excuse not to be with someone they don't like, ever thought of that?

Fears just might be one of the few things that define us as people here on earth.  That set us apart from the "outsiders".  Like what one of our journal entries were supposed to be about.  What makes us human, our fears make us human.

Love?

Love is a confusing thing.  I can't even explain it, all I can say is that it is an emotion that people feel for one another.  Have I ever been in love, no, I have not.  To me it is ridiculous when people say they love another person at our age. You might like them, or are infatuated, basically just liking someone with a burning fiery passion haha.  You might be just lusting over someone.  But that's just my opinion.  Think what you want about this subject but don't ask me.  I'm distraught about this kind of thing anyway.

Forget

I am truly sorry for my last post, I was venting and didn't know what I was even going on about.  So to all those who were offended I apologize for what I have said. 
Basically what I am saying is to forget my last post and just continue reading.  I thought this was supposed to be somewhere we could just write and there wouldn't be criticism but I guess I was wrong. 
To the person who thought I was part of the band... I'm not, but funny joke!  You're hilarious!
If my posts bug you just keep your comments to yourself.  I can write about whatever I want to so get used to it

Thank you

Humans

How are we even supposed to know?  Sometimes I think to myself that nothing could be real.  Have any of you ever seen the Truman Show?  I feel as if that my life could be like that, people always watching, waiting for me to mess up.  Something people always say is that, "everyone's human, everyone makes stupid mistakes."  Mistakes are the things that define peoples lives.  Good or bad.  You just have to learn to go with the flow and let things play out to what they are going to be.  I have yet to perfect this. 

 If people are supposed to make mistakes why are people so freaking judgmental.  You mess up once and for the rest of your damn life they criticize you for that stupid mistake.  

I guess this is why my blog is called listen to me rant.  I just vent all my feelings onto here.

And in case I don't see ya, Good afternoon good evening and goodnight!

Enjoy

Intro

Why are some of us even in this class.  Most of us are thinking to ourselves ohhh look its going to be so easy, but others in the class actually want to get some kind of writing ability out of this class.  I've never been able to come up with good ideas and I think that this class is going to help me with that.

    I have always wanted to be able to just sit down at a computer screen, like I am now, and just write.  To be able to write like its literally nothing and all my ideas are just flowing from my mind to my hands and onto the keys.  But no, I let my fear of embarrassment from my ideas get in the way of my writing.

   The story behind my alias being what it is, is because Heath Ledger is possibly the greatest actor in Knights Tale ever.  In the movie he tries as hard as he can to do something that is not meant for him, its meant for actual knights, which he is not.  What I'm saying is, just because someone tells you that you aren't good at something or that something can't be done doesn't mean that you can't do it.  You should try as hard as you can to fulfill your dream.  So I am using his character as my inspiration to write in this class.